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Financial Humor

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Back in the Goode Olde Days, people spent uncounted hours trying to forecast the future. If they had a cat, they could try felidomancy, which is the art of using cats to predict the future. If they had feet, they could try pedomancy.

Nowadays, people indulge in fedomancy, which is the art of predicting interest rates by observing the Federal Reserve Board. It's a difficult practice.

John Wagooner,
USA Today

God, grant me the capital to accept the things I cannot change; the reserves to change the things I can; and the Fed Auction when all that blows up. Amen.

Calculated Risk

If Her Majesty the Queen wishes to be truly illuminated why most economists failed to see the Crash coming, it's very simple: you get what you pay for: neoclassical economists are mathematicians willing to bent to the dominant ideology: the free-market “religion”. Like all religions, it is showing amazing resilience in the face of empirical evidence. Or in more laymen terms: how those neoclassical sex workers could see it coming, if they all were busy performing oral sex with banksters.

The fact the most economists are intellectual prostitutes is undisputable. What is strange is that they are paid much better then porno stars. What a humiliation for the most ancient profession --

Due to the size financial skeptic dictionary is now converted to a separate page


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A quick calculation… The 2010 Wall Street bonuses
were equal to 2.88 million $50,000 jobs.

[Sep 20, 2020] The Criminal Prosecution Of Boeing Executives Should Begin

Sep 20, 2020 |


jayman21 , 2 hours ago

The invisible hand will do its job.

WedgeMan , 1 hour ago

Afraid not, it is too busy giving hand jobs.

Zero-Hegemon , 34 minutes ago

Invisible Hand jobs?

[Aug 31, 2020] Economics Quotes

Aug 31, 2020 |

Just as a poetic discussion of the weather is not meteorology, so an issuance of moral pronouncements or political creeds about the economy is not economics. Economics is a study of cause-and-effect relationships in an economy.

-- Thomas Sowell

The first lesson of economics is scarcity: There is never enough of anything to satisfy all those who want it. The first lesson of politics is to disregard the first lesson of economics.

-- Thomas Sowell

Economics is the painful elaboration of the obvious.

The curious task of economics is to demonstrate to men how little they really know about what they imagine they can design.

-- Friedrich von Hayek

I can't imagine economists admitting how little they actually know. If they admitted to themselves, it would hurt their ego. If they admitted to others, it would hurt their job prospects.

-- Joseph Mattes, Vienna (The Economist, letters December 04, 2010)

The use of mathematics has brought rigor to economics. Unfortunately, it has also brought mortis .

-- Attributed to Robert Heilbroner

A study of economics usually reveals that the best time to buy anything is last year.

-- Marty Allen

Economic statistics are like a bikini, what they reveal is important, what they conceal is vital

-- Attributed to Professor Sir Frank Holmes, Victoria University, Wellington, New Zealand, 1967.

Doing econometrics is like trying to learn the laws of electricity by playing the radio.

-- Guy Orcutt


-- David Wildasin

"Murphys law of economic policy": Economists have the least influence on policy where they know the most and are most agreed; they have the most influence on policy where they know the least and disagree most vehemently.

-- Alan S. Blinder

An economist is someone who, when he finds something that works in practice, tries to make it work in theory.

The purpose of studying economics is not to acquire a set of ready-made answers to economic questions, but to learn how to avoid being deceived by economists.

-- Joan Violet Robinson

An economist is an expert who will know tomorrow why the things he predicted yesterday didn't happen today.

-- Laurence J. Peter

Having a[n in] house economist became for many business people something like havinga resident astrologer for the royal court: I don't quite understand what this fellow is saying but there must be something to it.

-- Linden. (Jan. 11, 1993). Dreary Days in the Dismal Science. Forbes. Pp. 68-70.

Economics is the only field in which two people can get a Nobel Prize for saying exactly the opposite thing.

Economists do it with models.

-- Heard at the LSE

Bentley's second Law of Economics: The only thing more dangerous than an economist is an amateur economist!

Berta's Fundamental Law of Economic Rents.. "The only thing more dangerous than an amateur economist is a professional economist."

Definition: Policy Analyst is someone unethical enough to be a lawyer, impractical enough to be a theologian, and pedantic enough to be an economist.

Economists have forecasted 9 out of the last 5 recessions.

An econometrician and an astrologer are arguing about their subjects. The astrologer says, "Astrology is more scientific. My predictions come out right half the time. Yours can't even reach that proportion". The econometrician replies, "That's because of external shocks. Stars don't have those".

When an economist says the evidence is "mixed," he or she means that theory says one thing and data says the opposite.

-- Attributed to Richard Thaler, now at the Univ of Chicago

The last severe depression and banking crisis could not have been achieved by normal civil servants and politicians, it required economists involvement.


State run lotteries: think of them as tax breaks for the intelligent.

-- Evan Leibovitch


Inflation is the one form of taxation that can be imposed without legislation.

-- Milton Friedman

Having a little inflation is like being a little pregnant–inflation feeds on itself and quickly passes the "little" mark.

-- Dian Cohen

Trade and Trade Barriers

Tariffs, quotas and other import restrictions protect the business of the rich at the expense of high cost of living for the poor. Their intent is to deprive you of the right to choose, and to force you to buy the high-priced inferior products of politically favored companies.

-- Alan Burris, A Liberty Primer

Perhaps the removal of trade restrictions throughout the world would do more for the cause of universal peace than can any political union of peoples separated by trade barriers.

-- Frank Chodorov

When goods don't cross borders, soldiers will.

-- Fredric Bastiat, early French economist

The primary reason for a tariff is that it enables the exploitation of the domestic consumer by a process indistinguishable from sheer robbery.

-- Albert Jay Nock


Regulation - which is based on force and fear - undermines the moral base of business dealings. It becomes cheaper to bribe a building inspector than to meet his standards of construction. A fly-by-night securities operator can quickly meet all the S.E.C. requirements, gain the inference of respectability, and proceed to fleece the public. In an unregulated economy, the operator would have had to spend a number of years in reputable dealings before he could earn a position of trust sufficient to induce a number of investors to place funds with him. Protection of the consumer by regulation is thus illusory.

-- Alan Greenspan

You fucking academic eggheads! You don't know shit. You can't deregulate this industry. You're going to wreck it. You don't know a goddamn thing!

-- Robert Crandall, boss of American Airlines, to an unnamed Senate lawyer in 1971


The direct use of physical force is so poor a solution to the problem of limited resources that it is commonly employed only by small children and great nations.

-- David Friedman

Government Spending

See, when the Government spends money, it creates jobs; whereas when the money is left in the hands of Taxpayers, God only knows what they do with it. Bake it into pies, probably. Anything to avoid creating jobs.

-- Dave Barry

I don't think you can spend yourself rich.

-- George Humphrey

Capitalism and Free Markets

A major source of objection to a free economy is precisely that it gives people what they want instead of what a particular group thinks they ought to want. Underlying most arguments against the free market is a lack of belief in freedom itself.

-- Milton Friedman

The most important single central fact about a free market is that no exchange takes place unless both parties benefit.

-- Milton Friedman

The only thing worse than being exploited by capitalism is not being exploited by capitalism.

-- Joan Violet Robinson

Manufacturing and commercial monopolies owe their origin not to a tendency imminent in a capitalist economy but to governmental interventionist policy directed against free trade and laissez faire.

-- Ludwig Mises, "Socialism"

If an exchange between two parties is voluntary, it will not take place unless both believe they will benefit from it. Most economic fallacies derive from the neglect of this simple insight, from the tendency to assume that there is a fixed pie, that one party can only gain at the expense of another.

-- Milton Friedman

States with central-planning regimes [ ] do tend to consume much less energy (and much less of everything else) [ ] than do Americans. There is a word for that: poverty.

-- The Politically Incorrect Guide to Socialism

Central Banks

Any system which gives so much power and so much discretion to a few men, [so] that mistakes – excusable or not – can have such far reaching effects, is a bad system. It is a bad system to believers in freedom just because it gives a few men such power without any effective check by the body politic – this is the key political argument against an independent central bank To paraphrase Clemenceau: money is much too serious a matter to be left to the Central Bankers.

-- Milton Friedman

A central banker walks into a pizzeria to order a pizza.

When the pizza is done, he goes up to the counter get it. There a clerk asks him: "Should I cut it into six pieces or eight pieces?"

The central banker replies: "I'm feeling rather hungry right now. You'd better cut it into eight pieces."

Intellectual Property

For one thing, there are many "inventions" that are not patentable. The "inventor" of the supermarket, for example, conferred great benefits on his fellowmen for which he could not charge them. Insofar as the same kind of ability is required for the one kind of invention as for the other, the existence of patents tends to divert activity to patentable inventions.

-- Milton Friedman


From the experience of all ages and nations, I believe, that the work done by freemen comes cheaper in the end than the work performed by slaves.

The work done by slaves, though it appears to cost only their maintenance, is in the end the dearest of any. A person who can acquire no property can have no other interest but to eat as much and to labour as little as possible.

Whatever work he does, beyond what is sufficient to purchase his own maintenance, can be squeezed out of him by violence only, and not by any interest of his own.

-- Adam Smith


It is because it's prohibited. See, if you look at the drug war from a purely economic point of view, the role of the government is to protect the drug cartel. That's literally true.

-- Milton Friedman

In the Long Run
Minimum Wage and Unemployment

The real minimum wage is zero: unemployment.

-- Thomas Sowell

All of the progress that the US has made over the last couple of centuries has come from unemployment. It has come from figuring out how to produce more goods with fewer workers, thereby releasing labor to be more productive in other areas. It has never come about through permanent unemployment, but temporary unemployment, in the process of shifting people from one area to another.

-- Milton Friedman


Talk is cheap. Supply exceeds Demand.

It is difficult to get a man to understand something when his salary depends on his not understanding it.

-- Upton Sinclair

When you start paying people to be poor, you wind up with an awful lot of poor people.

-- Milton Friedman

of course the country could never listen to this guy .it just makes too much damn sense.

-- ryanx0 about Milton Friedman []

Every individual necessarily labors to render the annual revenue of society as great as he can. He generally neither intends to promote the public interest, nor knows how much he is promoting it. He intends only his own gain, and he is, in this, as in many other cases, led by an invisible hand to promote an end which was not part of his intention.

-- Adam Smith, Wealth of Nations

Back during the Solidarity days, I heard that the following joke was being told in Poland:

A man goes into the Bank of Gdansk to make a deposit. Since he has never kept money in a bank before, he is a little nervous. 
"What happens if the Bank of Gdansk should fail?" he asks. 
"Well, in that case your money would be insured by the Bank of Warsaw." 
"But, what if the Bank of Warsaw fails?" 
"Well, there'd be no problem, because the Bank of Warsaw is insured by the National Bank of Poland." 
"And if the National Bank of Poland fails?" 
"Then your money would be insured by the Bank of Moscow." 
"And what if the Bank of Moscow fails?" 
"Then your money would be insured by the Great Bank of the Soviet Union." 
"And if that bank fails?" 
"Well, in that case, you'd lose all your money. But, wouldn't it be worth it?"

All models are wrong but some are useful.

-- George Box

I'd rather be vaguely right than precisely wrong.

-- J.M.Keynes; Found in Forbes magazine 01/25/1999 issue. In the Numbers Game column by Bernard Cohen

Far better an approximate answer to the right question, which is often vague, than an exact answer to the wrong question, which can always be made precise.

-- J. Tukey

There is an entirely leisure class located at both ends of the economic spectrum

[Aug 24, 2020] Tesla market cap $300B v. Exxon at $190B.

Aug 24, 2020 |

Stephen Hren Ignored says: 08/16/2020 AT 1:03 PM

Tesla market cap – $300B v. Exxon at $190B.

Wall Street is very story driven. They wasted a decade throwing money at tight oil and lost billions. It's hard to see how this tight oil story gets resuscitated. The '10s saw free debt, low regulatory regime, no effective alternatives to oil, skilled work force, entrenched globalized oil markets, no pandemics, etc, and they STILL lost hundreds of billions. Wall Street wants to lose their money in new ways. At least they get some novelty out of it.

[Aug 23, 2020] A Love Letter To The Fed From The Adoring Stock Market -

Aug 23, 2020 |

Authored by Michael Regan via Bloomberg (emphasis ours),

Dear Fed,

Hey there! It's me, the stock market. I know it's weird to write you like this, but I felt like I needed to drop a quick thank-you note for everything you've done for me this year. I mean, your big ol' balance sheet is almost $3 trillion larger since early March! You're backing up the truck and loading it with Treasuries and corporate bonds and bond ETFs, all to keep the competition to stocks from fixed-income yields as limited as Jim Cramer's understanding of me. It's been a dream come true, honestly. I mean, fess up: Have you been reading my diary?!

... ... ...

So please do me a solid and keep this thank-you note in mind when you host your virtual Jackson Hole summit. No cowboy stuff, OK? If I hear anybody mutter something about "irrational exuberance," I swear I'm gonna blow my top and hurt a few of these Robinhood types, you got that? The Lord giveth, and the Lord taketh away. It's what I do -- and I'm good at it! But right now, this is still a lot of fun for me...

...  and when I do end up burning folks, do you really want to be the one who gets thrown under the bus?

I mean, you know you're going to catch all the blame, right?



Receive a daily recap featuring a curated list of must-read stories.

C'mon, Fed. We both know you're smarter than that. What's another few trillion?

With sincere and deepest gratitude,

The Stock Market

[Jun 04, 2020] When recruiters or job ads say "flexible working hours" all I hear is "you must be flexible to work whatever hours we give you"

Jun 04, 2020 |

Suadela , 4 months ago

When recruiters or job ads say "flexible working hours" all I hear is "you must be flexible to work whatever hours we give you"

[May 06, 2020] Whom Bitcoin brings together

May 06, 2020 |

Deltaeus , May 6 2020 9:29 utc | 63

@karlof1 | May 5 2020 21:05 utc | 18

There was an amusing quote from somewhere, something like:

Bitcoin brings together
everything people don't understand about money with
everything people don't understand about technology.

[Apr 06, 2020] A sound banker, alas! is not one who foresees danger and avoids it, but one who, when he is ruined, is ruined in a conventional and orthodox way along with his fellows, so that no one can really blame him. ~Keynes

Highly recommended!
Apr 06, 2020 |

notabanktoadie , April 6, 2020 at 8:04 am

A sound banker, alas! is not one who foresees danger and avoids it, but one who, when he is ruined, is ruined in a conventional and orthodox way along with his fellows, so that no one can really blame him. Keynes via Yves

The problem is that the payment system, besides grubby coins and paper Central Bank notes (e.g. Federal Reserve Notes), must work through private depository institutions or not at all.

How then can we have a sound economy when it is held hostage by "sound" bankers?

And are not the banks a form of rentier – who rent the Nation its money supply?

Then where are the proposals of the MMT School to euthanize those rentiers?

[Apr 05, 2020] Capitalism is the legitimate racket of the ruling class. Al Capone

Apr 05, 2020 |

Mao , Apr 6 2020 2:25 utc | 134

Al Capone Money Quote saying that being a capitalist is the legitimate racket of those in power – with laws to back it up. Al Capone said:

"Capitalism is the legitimate racket of the ruling class."

[Mar 28, 2020] Just imagine the French hoity toity now not having to put up with the yellow vests in the streets. Must be such a comforting relief.

Mar 28, 2020 |

Old and Grumpy , says: Show Comment

[Mar 28, 2020] One common flavour of modern idiotism: I've heard doctors and pharmacists complain that patients will get offended when prescribed a cheaper, older drug. They want the best and newest, they need and deserve it!

Highly recommended!
Mar 28, 2020 |

Redneck farmer , says: Show Comment March 27, 2020 at 10:09 am GMT

There is also a tendency to think newer=better. I've heard doctors and pharmacists complain that patients will get offended when prescribed a cheaper, older drug. They want the best and newest, they need and deserve it!
Jake , says: Show Comment March 27, 2020 at 11:42 am GMT
@Redneck farmer That is because advertising works. Drug companies being allowed to advertise guaranteed that predators, such as the Sacklers, would want to own drug companies.
Oracle , says: Show Comment March 27, 2020 at 2:43 pm GMT
More activity on the dark, unethical side of capitalism. There's an entire history of it, opium wars, Atlantic slave trade, pornography, control of political agents through pedophilia. The list does go on and strangely enough it's usually the same actors.

[Mar 27, 2020] We have to beg for hand sanitizer? It's almost like we are one of the nations under strct USA sanction

Mar 27, 2020 |

karlof1 , Mar 26 2020 23:56 utc | 90

Just one of many important anecdotal observations :

"We have to beg for hand sanitizer? It's almost like we are one of the nations we sanction."

[Mar 27, 2020] Exactly when did behaviour of neoliberals become a bunch of out-takes from Catch-22?"

Mar 27, 2020 |

bevin , Mar 27 2020 1:17 utc | 98

Here's a story from today's Toronto Star. It's a neoliberalism story and goes well with Pepe Escobar's piece in Asia Times (see above for link)
Basically the Province of Ontario stockpiled everything need for the pandemic that SARs warned them was bound to come.

Then, a couple of years ago, they destroyed the stockpiles including 55 million facemasks.

Now there are no face masks to be found and medical staff, inter alia, are having to take totally unnecessary risks.

Why did this happen? Because neo-liberalism is all about profits and fiscal austerity: as soon as the masks got beyond their 'best before' date they were destroyed - so the manufacturers could have another bite at the cherry and sell another 55 million masks. But then, austerity, the need to finance tax cuts for the wealthy, stepped in so the orders were not renewed. And people will die, horrible deaths, as a result.

[Mar 27, 2020] Looks like the USA and the Soviet Union traded jerseys after the wall fell.

Mar 27, 2020 |

steve , Mar 26 2020 22:46 utc | 75

For me the USA and the Soviet Union traded jerseys after the wall fell. The USA took victory way to seriously.

[Mar 27, 2020] Larry Summers should have a drink named after him

Mar 27, 2020 |

uncle tungsten , Mar 26 2020 19:46 utc | 22

karlof1 #10

Larry Summers should have a drink named after him.
Ofshore double hoarder
Safebreaker with tonic
Gin and plunder scammer

Thanks b,I bought last roll of narrow elastic yesterday and will cut up some old silk shirts today.

[Mar 27, 2020] Trump's about as innocent in the coronavirus fiasco as jack the ripper

Mar 27, 2020 |

Miss Lacy , Mar 26 2020 20:32 utc | 35

PS to vk # 1. Please think again. Trump has been in a trade war with China for what? a couple of years? AND, he specifically banned imports of medical supplies from China. Other posters wave supplied links for this idiocy.

Trump's about as innocent as jack the ripper. You may just be seeing things relatively, as ghouls like Elliot Abrahms and disgusting Pomposity make Trump seen like an amateur.

Stock market speculation is a great idea in theory, but not for ordinary investors, who are fleeced by Wall Street

[Mar 25, 2020] Goldman Gives CEO 20% Raise - While Forecasting Major Coronavirus-caused Financial Crash for Americans

Mar 25, 2020 |

Boiling frogss , says: Show Comment March 25, 2020 at 1:46 pm GMT

Goldman Gives CEO 20% Raise-

While Forecasting Major CoronaVirus-Caused Financial Crash for Americans

[Sep 13, 2019] Clowns, AI and layoffs

Sep 13, 2019 |

Bugs Bunny , September 13, 2019 at 4:25 pm

Clowns should be increasingly used in redundancy (layoff, firing) meetings until it becomes the norm and employers start to compete with each other to offer the best clown redundancy experience and promote it as a benefit.

It would also create clown jobs, which would probably require more clown schools, meaning that the tuition prices would go through the roof and young people dreaming of becoming redundancy clowns would either have to come from wealth or take out massive clown loans to fund their education for clown universities and grad schools. Shareholders can only take so much top line costs and Wall Street pressure would force corporations to improve return on investment and reduce redundancy clown labor expenses. Sadly, redundancy clowns would find themselves training their own replacements – HB1 clowns from "low cost" countries. Employers would respond to quality criticisms of the HB1 clown experience by publishing survey results showing very similar almost ex-employee satisfaction with the new clowns.

Eventually, of course, redundancy clowns will be replaced by AI and robots. It's just the future and we will need to think about how to adapt to it today by putting in place a UBI for the inevitable redundant redundancy clowns.

[Sep 10, 2019] What s wrong with you people ?

Mar 11, 2014 |

[Sep 04, 2019] Economists had 'a far greater sense of confidence in their analyses than I have found to be warranted. They were best kept down with the surplus furniture and the rats

Sep 04, 2019 |

"Few economists worked at the Federal Reserve in the early 1950s. Those who were on the staff of America's central bank were relegated to the basement, at a safe remove from the corridors where real decisions were made.

Economists had their uses, allowed William McChesney Martin, then the Fed's chairman. But they also had 'a far greater sense of confidence in their analyses than I have found to be warranted'. They were best kept down with the surplus furniture and the rats." • Indeed!

[Aug 25, 2019] Trump and the value of the 90 days probation period for any newly elected President

Aug 25, 2019 |

youshallnotkill , 2 hours ago link

The markets love nothing more than uncertainty. Anybody who says otherwise is spreading fake news. /s

Serious question: Is he shorting the market? Nobody can be this dumb or demented.

free corn , 2 hours ago link

Never underestimate a comedian!

steverino999 , 2 hours ago link

It's just too bad being elected President doesn't come with a 90-day probationary period that many employers use, because if they did Mike Pence would be considering a 2nd Term run right now.........

[Aug 23, 2019] I believe being oblivious is the main qualification for being a successful mainstream economist.

Notable quotes:
"... I believe being oblivious is the main qualification for being a successful mainstream economist. ..."
Aug 23, 2019 |

Skip Intro , , August 23, 2019 at 2:29 pm

I believe being oblivious is the main qualification for being a successful mainstream economist.

[Aug 23, 2019] Poorly targeted is in reality "richly targeted" under neoliberalism

Aug 23, 2019 |

Samuel Conner , August 23, 2019 at 7:30 am

"Government set to inject more than $1 Trillion into US economy this year, but poorly targeted and still isn't enough to improve the lives of most people".

fixed it.

Elspeth , August 23, 2019 at 11:16 am

"poorly targeted", no no my friend it's benefiting the ususally suspects.

Synoia , August 23, 2019 at 11:23 am

"richly targeted" would be most accurate.

[Aug 23, 2019] Is nonsense economic throes promoted by NYT a deliberate policy or are they really ignorant ?

Aug 23, 2019 |

templar555510 , August 23, 2019 at 8:41 am

Spot-on . Whenever I read this nonsense in the NYT or elsewhere I always ask myself the same question ' Is this deliberate or are they really ignorant ? ' . I suspect the latter, but I could be wrong.

MichaelSF , August 23, 2019 at 12:17 pm

There's no reason it can't be both.

[Aug 23, 2019] Austerity is Prosperity

Aug 23, 2019 |

Ian Perkins , August 23, 2019 at 10:57 am

"War Is Peace, Freedom Is Slavery, Ignorance Is Strength." And if Orwell were still around, perhaps he would add: Austerity is Prosperity.

Synoia , August 23, 2019 at 11:24 am

Warriors are Peacekeepers

[Aug 23, 2019] Checkmate, liberals

Aug 23, 2019 |

Dr. James Rustler , August 23, 2019 at 2:03 pm

Excuse me, how can the deficit be increasing [with Trump tax cuts]?

I was told that a simple bell curve graph called the 'Laffer Curve' indicates that cutting taxes increases growth which increases revenue. Its simply mathematics.

Checkmate, liberals

[Aug 23, 2019] I remember when Qaddafi was murdered and Libya fell. Within the first day or two a central bank was set up in Libya. And look how well that is working out for them.

Aug 23, 2019 |

The Rev Kev , August 23, 2019 at 7:06 pm

Well, Lawrence H. Summers is right to worry when he says "Can central banking as we know it be the primary tool of macroeconomic stabilization in the industrial world over the next decade?"

I remember when Qaddafi was murdered and Libya fell. Within the first day or two a central bank was set up in Libya. And look how well that is working out for them.

[Aug 23, 2019] Investment advice from Wall Street for workers and their 401k just before the Great Recession: "Don't worry about the price. Invest now as much as you can. You can't predict the market "

Aug 23, 2019 |

Summer , August 23, 2019 at 7:32 pm

"It sure is weird that the labor market is the only place where the magic of the marketplace -- price! -- doesn't work."

I also hear weirdness about price considerations when I read investment advice for workers and their 401ks.
"Don't worry about the price. Invest now as much as you can. You can't predict the market "
(Looks down at Twitter feed).

[Aug 23, 2019] One can hope that Larry Summers will eventually convert to MMT, especially if he get a stipend for that

Aug 23, 2019 |

Samuel Conner , August 23, 2019 at 2:21 pm

One can hope that Larry S will eventually convert to MMT, but I intuit that if that does happen, it will only be on his deathbed.

Synoia , August 23, 2019 at 2:38 pm

Or when receiving a huge stipend from a MMT adherent.

a different chris , August 23, 2019 at 3:05 pm

Haha so right and we mistakenly claim that economists don't know how the real economy works. They know, and part of that knowledge is that you need to shill the BS for those with the money if you wanna get your own piece of said pie.

[Aug 03, 2019] Perhaps when the PLA finish in hongkong they can come over here and deal with antifa since our government at any level does not appear to have the sense or spine to do it themselves

Aug 03, 2019 |

ted richard , 03 August 2019 at 01:22 PM

Hongkong is no longer of great importance for bejing as a financial and trading locus. up and down the south china sea coast are many cities of far greater importance than Hongkong.

perhaps when the PLA finish in hongkong they can come over here and deal with antifa since our government at any level does not appear to have the sense or spine to do it themselves

[Aug 03, 2019] Hell's Top Banker Explains How To Destroy The Global Economy

Some of the other stuff we've encouraged, such as The EU, ETFs, Hi-Frequency Trading, Neil Woodford and Deutsche Bank look likely to be highly effective vectors of short-term economic destruction and destabilization
Aug 03, 2019 |

(Edited version of the speech given by the TJ Wormwood, Chief Demonic Officer – Finance, Lord of 3rd Ring of the 7th Circle, to invited audience at Davos.)

Dear Colleagues,

As you all know, I've been wrecking finance for millennia. [Pause for effect]

Nearly every major big idea, evolutionary leap forward, invention and discovery has improved the miserable lot of mankind only through their ability to monetise it. Forget the theft of fire – being able to monetise fire by attracting pretty and willing mates around a warm campfire, or cooking the food others have hunted, is what mattered. Strip out the noise, and the rise of mankind is largely due to improvements in the efficiency and ease of means of exchange.

From the realisation hunters could barter their furs for other goods, to the rise of complex products to finance global growth – the innovation of financial markets has been a major driver of success for the Other Side in raising the wellbeing and prosperity of mankind. Pretty much anything that holds back or disrupts trade, increases costs and holds back services is naturally positive for our goal of global destabilisation.

So, here is the big plan:

Since 2007 we've been turning the Other Side's successful innovation of financial markets against them. Global Financial Markets are incredibly rich in opportunities to distort truth, hide lies, and undermine mankind – generating immediate greed, envy, suspicion and anger. We've uncovered previously unimaginable ways in which to financially screw the World with consequences that impact everyone.

We've overlaid the programme with our mastery and understanding of temptation, human greed, avarice and pride, while adding subtlety and cunning. We merely suggest and advise. We are facilitating the train-wreck of the global economy by destroying asset values while confounding their understanding of money and wealth – the pillars of their society.

At its simplest form we are manipulating and driving constant market instability to keep mankind distracted. Uncertainty clouds their future expectations – so we keep it raining. A Mortgage crisis one year, followed by a Sovereign Debt crisis the next, spiced with a couple of bank failures, and threats of global trade war. Overlay with confusion and distraction such as social media, fake news, Bitcoin and populism, and it all works rather well.

Keep their leaders arguing. Keep the blame game going.

Our success can be seen in current financial asset prices. These are now hopelessly inflated and distorted by foolish post financial crisis policy decisions. They are bubbles set to pop. Empower the regulators and bureaucrats to compromise finance through zealous over-regulation, making banking safer by destroying it. Usher in a new era of trade protectionism, the end of Free Trade and increase the suspicion some countries are manipulating their currencies for economic advantage. Sprinkle some dust of political catastrophe, the collapse of law, undo the fair, just and caring society, while adding some eye of newt and complex environmental threats. Make the rich so rich they don't notice, and the poor so poor they become invisible. If the markets remain uncertain, then it distracts mankind from addressing these issues, making society less stable!

There as some things we're really proud of, including the Euro, Social Media, Investment Banks, the Tech Boom, and especially Quantitative Easing (which is still delivering confusion and pain). New Monetary Theory could prove even better – it shows tremendous potential to thoroughly unsettle confidence in money. Cybercurrencies are particularly fun – despite coming up with the idea, neither we, nor even the distinguished members of our panel of eternal guests, understand the why of them. They are libertarian nonsense – so, naturally we continue to encourage them as get-rich-quick schemes, but they also further undermine confidence in money and government. We made something up in a bar one night and called it a Distributed Ledger - the humans ran with it and invented Blockchain, whatever that might be..

Some of the other stuff we've encouraged, such as The EU, ETFs, Hi-Frequency Trading, Neil Woodford and Deutsche Bank look likely to be highly effective vectors of short-term economic destruction and destabilisation, triggering systemic market events and regulatory backlashes across markets. We are only now exploring the full potential of market illiquidity to rob billions of pensioners of their savings.

We've persuaded investors to overturn proven tried and tested investment strategies and wisdoms, nurturing a whole range of overpriced unprofitable US Tech "Unicorn" companies which we are confident will prove utterly over-hyped and largely worthless. The success of social media, data mining and new tech has increased levels of dissatisfaction and envy – especially in our target younger demography.

The way we successfully pinned the blame on banks for the Global Financial Crisis – despite the fact it was people who wanted mortgages to buy houses and fast cars - ensured global regulators would over-react. We've allowed regulators to focus on banks while we target the next financial crisis in other parts of the financial ecosystem.

Regulators forced the banks to de-risk. But risk does not disappear - it just goes somewhere else. While banks understood risk and had massive staffs to manage risk, risk is now concentrated in the hands of "investment managers" who are singularly ill-equipped to withstand the next credit crunch and global recession, (which we've planned for next October – Save the Date cards have been sent).

We are particularly pleased that many banks now exceed the 2.3 compliance officers for every profitable banker ratio. Compliance and regulatory costs now exceed 10% of income at some European banks – a stunning success and substantially decreasing the efficiency of banking and exchanges.

We've some great new financial ideas we are still experimenting with, some of which show great promise for further weakening society. Facebook Money is going to be a cracker, and I particularly like the Spaceship to Mars project if only they knew what awaits them

By hiding inflation in the stock market, we assisted the accumulation of massive wealth by a tiny percentage of the population to ferment income inequality dissatisfaction. When capital is concentrated and the workers under the cosh, it creates all the right conditions for weak disjointed government to aid and abet the rise of destabilising populism.

It's highly satisfying to watch the instability we've created in financial markets drive fear and distrust across society. The debt crisis we engineered led to global financial austerity, job insecurity, and rising inequality. We were surprised how easily we pushed the Gig economy concept to further exploit and cow workers through regulators and authorities – they barely noticed. Over this we've layered whole new levels of anxiety such as the unknowns of data theft, the rise in envy coefficients through social media, fake news while fuelling social distrust through resentment.

We've managed to persuade Governments to follow damaging and contradictory policies. As society reeled in the wake of the financial crisis, we persuaded policy makers to cut back spending through "austerity" spending programmes, simultaneously bailing out bankers while flooding the financial economy with free money through Quantitative Easing.

Effectively we've split the world into two economies. A real economy which is sad, miserable and deflating, and a financial economy that's insanely optimistic, massively inflated and ripe to pop on the back of free money.

The resentment, instability, fear and general sense of decay has paid dividends in our drive to break society by undermining the credibility of the political classes. Our approach to politics has been simple – deskill the political classes, reduce their effectiveness as leaders, while engineering economic, social and financial instability to drive rampaging populist politics – just like in 1932! Populism may ultimately prove short-lived, but it's difficult to see how the political classes will recover their power in time to reverse the damages being done to the global environment.

While markets have burned, society become increasingly riven, and politics has failed, we've distracted the humans from the rising levels of carbon dioxide in the atmosphere which threatens to create global warming and rising sea levels, while plastics poison the oceans and soil erosion threatens agriculture.

Now I love the ravenous hunger and sharp pointy teeth of polar bears as much as the next demon, but needs must... needs must. I was also rather fond of the dinosaurs...

Our approach to ensuring destructive climate change has proved very effective. We've supported, financed and advised the loudest green lobbies to ensure their message looks ill-considered, wrong and economic suicide. We also paid big bucks to fund the loudest climate change deniers. Our innovation of fake news to discredit and mitigate anything positive means climate change remains a crank topic – even as our polar bears drown.

Meanwhile, through our dominance of global boardrooms and investment firms, we've made sure that large corporates have bought-out and stifled new technologies that could solve the environmental crisis.

Our future looks great – because their future is bleak!

Thank you for your kind attention.

TJ Wormwood,

Demonic Chief Office – Finance

[Jul 22, 2019] When the music stops, in terms of liquidity, things will be complicated

Jul 22, 2019 |

"When the music stops, in terms of liquidity, things will be complicated. But as long as the music is playing, you've got to get up and dance. We're still dancing,"

Chuck Prince, CEO Citigroup, July 9, 2007

[Jul 22, 2019] A baited banker

Jul 22, 2019 |

"A baited banker thus desponds,
From his own hand foresees his fall,
They have his soul, who have his bonds;
'Tis like the writing on the wall.

How will the caitiff wretch be scared,
When first he finds himself awake
At the last trumpet, unprepared,
And all his grand account to make!

For in that universal call,
Few bankers will to heaven be mounters;
They'll cry, 'Ye shops, upon us fall!
Conceal and cover us, ye counters!'

When other hands the scales shall hold,
And they, in men's and angels' sight
Produced with all their bills and gold,
'Weigh'd in the balance and found light!'

Jonathan Swift, A Run Upon the Bankers

[Jun 10, 2019] Are Bonds Peaking-Interest Rates Bottoming

Jun 10, 2019 |

Bam_Man , 3 hours ago link

One year ago, EVERYBODY was a bond "bear", predicting a long string of rate hikes that would bring Fed Funds up to 4.50%.

They were ALL wrong. VERY wrong.

They are probably just as wrong now that they are bond "bulls".

Greenspazm , 1 hour ago link

No, if you use kimble charting technical analysis you will get very rich.

Bam_Man , 1 hour ago link


[Jun 10, 2019] If ever there were a candidate who might be inclined to rethink our relationship with the Saudis, it's Buttigieg.

Notable quotes:
"... He would be given a lavish reception in Riyadh, where he would deliver a speech thanking our Saudi allies for leading the brave fight against "Iranian homophobia." ..."
Jun 10, 2019 |

Timothy Hagios , 09 June 2019 at 01:49 PM

On the bright side, if ever there were a candidate who might be inclined to rethink our relationship with the Saudis, it's Buttigieg.

Oh, who am I kidding? He would be given a lavish reception in Riyadh, where he would deliver a speech thanking our Saudi allies for leading the brave fight against "Iranian homophobia."

[Apr 11, 2019] This free, free market

[Apr 03, 2019] The software's reengagement is what doomed everybody aboard Boeing Ethiopian Airlines Flight 302

Apr 03, 2019 |

Flankspeed60 , 2 hours ago link

Never thought Boeing would make Tesla look like a bunch of geniuses...

[Mar 19, 2019] "Monopoly" is such an ugly term.

Mar 19, 2019 |

Glen Tomkins 03.09.19 at 5:25 pm ( 2 )

"Monopoly" is such an ugly term. We prefer to call it "market power" these days, because of course it's a good thing if the job creators and their enterprises have more power to do all the good things they do for us.

It's clearly class warfare, if not racism, to use the term of abuse, "monopoly", when you mean "market power".

[Mar 06, 2019] The only real growth in the US -

Mar 06, 2019 |

1. Opiates/Big Pharma

2. Redundancies

3. John Bolton's harelip cover

[Feb 26, 2019] Gold Is Rallying Because....

Nov 25, 2009

within the Anglo-American sphere of influence .... the dollar had become the new opium trade, viciously addictive and debilitating

[Feb 25, 2019] Nation's Unemployment Outlook Improves Drastically After Fifth Beer

Hat tip to Barry Ritholtz's The Big Picture
Aug 28, 2009 | The Onion

WASHINGTON-Despite ongoing economic woes and a jobless rate that has been approaching 10 percent, U.S. unemployment projections drastically improved Monday after the consumption of five beers.

"It's going up," leading economist David Singleton said confidently, indicating the predicted growth in jobs with an upward wave of a Bud Light bottle. "All the way up. By the end of the month. No problem."

Singleton said the economy would begin its rebound once employers realized that there were many currently unemployed skilled laborers across the country who would "bust their asses" in a number of growing fields.

"Whether it's manufacturing, finance, hospitality, or manufacturing, these dudes trying to reenter the workforce right now have awesome skill sets and, most of all, they really deserve it," he said. "They're great, great guys. All of them."

According to analysts, both long- and short-term forecasts showed signs of recovery between the third and fourth beer...

... Reports from those well on their way toward putting away a whole six pack suggested that unemployed Americans could look forward to increased job security and much higher salaries. In addition, many half-in-the-bag analysts said they foresee greater career satisfaction and massive quality-of-life improvements following the inevitable arrival of new employment opportunities.

"Why should those who've lost work have to live paycheck to paycheck, doing some miserable wage-slave job a goddamn monkey could do?" said Donald Ellington, a completely hammered senior adviser at JPMorgan Chase. "All these layoffs, they're totally a blessing in disguise. Now these people can do the thing they've always wanted to do. Like becoming a sportswriter. Or a musician. Or a pilot, even!"

... Joblessness was not the only domestic problem that began to appear eminently solvable after the rapid downing of five beers. Also substantially improved were projections for the housing crisis, the affordability of health care, getting hot wings later, and being able to drive home just fine.

Though most on their fifth beer showed unbridled optimism-and in some cases outright cockiness-in terms of the employment landscape, those who greatly exceeded that number said they saw the current job market as hopelessly bleak. Contrary to the rosy prospects he had described earlier in the evening, economist David Singleton, after imbibing nine beers and an unknown quantity of Wild Turkey, lamented that there would have to be a comprehensive shift in the nation's entire economic structure before any lasting improvement could be realized.

[Feb 25, 2019] BoE expands QE

Not much changed from 2009
Sep 24, 2009 | FT Alphaville

Robert Mugabe CEO:

In banana republics it´s very common to not only pick bananas, but also print a lot of money. It´s said to be very cool. First you pick bananas, then cut down the trees, produce paper and finally print money on that paper. It´s the whole business cycle. Highly recommended!

[Feb 11, 2019] The so-called shale revolution, the fracking miracle, may have resulted in record oil and gas production in North America, but the real miracle -- in which shale companies make money fracking that oil and gas -- has yet to occur.

Feb 11, 2019 |

While U.S. politicians from both parties have given standing ovations for the U.S. oil and gas industry , investors appear to be losing their enthusiasm. The so-called shale revolution, the fracking miracle, may have resulted in record oil and gas production in North America, but the real miracle -- in which shale companies make money fracking that oil and gas -- has yet to occur.

[Feb 05, 2019] Fed's Dudley Explains How I Learned To Stop Worrying Love The Fed's Balance Sheet

Feb 05, 2019 |

"Stocks have reached a permanently high plateau", "subprime is contained", "there's no icebergs this far south" and now "The Fed's balance sheet is not the threat that people seem to think it is."

Man's ability to willfully ignore 'downside possibilities' and remain cognitively dissonant far longer than logic (or their pocketbook) should allow seems to know no bound and none other than The Federal Reserve's Bill Dudley just unleashed what could be the piece de resistance of "nothing to see here, move along" agitprop.

fersur , 19 minutes ago link

Great Picture' Cowboying a Nuke while discussing confidence in the FED, quite appropo' !

TRUTH @ 9:00; Plus this week, Friday will be Huge !

Should a seated President jail someone that attempted his Assassination, or a Former President that planned to Nuke the Yellowstone Super Volcano Caldera, or someone that sold email password to China and CC copied all 'to and from' messages including those highly Confidential, or blame a former President for planning 911 False Flag attack, or expose Planned Parenthoods first Amputating tongues for silently shipping in bulk, or expose Democrat history of Decades of Projecting blame while committing War Crimes, or end 19 Year War in Afghanistan ( Longest War ) then Syria against Last Night's Congressional Vote to keep status quo, or 'take a knee' and quit being President !

costa ludus , 42 minutes ago link

Is this from The Onion?

[Feb 05, 2019] Dad Heartbreakingly Thinks His Connections Can Help Son Find Job

Feb 05, 2019 |

CLEVELAND -- In a devastatingly sad overestimation of his influence in the professional world, local father Bruce Tenety, 54, expressed the heartbreaking belief Monday that his connections could help his son Justin, a recent college graduate, find a job. "You know, I actually have a friend in the media business, and if you shoot him an email and meet up for coffee, he just might be able to hook you up with something," said Tenety, who depressingly appeared to be under the impression that this tenuous contact from a conference he attended three years ago would not only remember his name, but would also be willing to extend an offer of employment to a 23-year-old he knows nothing about.

"I also know a guy who works at a PR firm in Mayfield Heights. Old Gary definitely owes me one from back in the day.

Hell, you could probably call him up right now and get an interview this week. Just tell him you're Bruce's kid."

At press time, sources confirmed Tenety had noticed his name was suspiciously absent from the references section on his son's most recent job application.

[Jan 21, 2019] Sound financial advice

Jan 21, 2019 |

BandGap , 2 hours ago link

Retirement? Hahahahahahahahahaha! Whatever.

in 2008 I switched everything into bonds, didn't lose anything in the market. In 2011 I got divorced and lost 55%. My advice, stay married.

[Jan 04, 2019] Seven habits that help produce the anything-but-efficient markets that rule the world by Paul Krugman in Fortune

1. Think short term.
2. Be greedy.
3. Believe in the greater fool
4. Run with the herd.
5. Overgeneralize
6. Be trendy
7. Play with other people's money

[Jan 03, 2019] The parable of casino capitalism, or neoliberal finance innovative method of weighting the ox via wisdom of the crowd

Jan 03, 2019 |

In 1906 the great statistician Francis Galton observed a competition to guess the weight of an ox at a country fair. Eight hundred people entered. Galton, being the kind of man he was, ran statistical tests on the numbers. He discovered that the average guess was extremely close to the weight of the ox. This story was told by James Surowiecki, in his entertaining book The Wisdom of Crowds. 2

Not many people know the events that followed. A few years later, the scales seemed to become less and less reliable. Repairs would be expensive, but the fair organiser had a brilliant idea. Since attendees were so good at guessing the weight of an ox, it was unnecessary' to repair the scales. The organiser would simply ask everyone to guess the weight, and take the average of their estimates.

A new problem emerged, however. Once weight-guessing competitions became the rage, some participants tried to cheat. They even tried to get privileged information from the farmer who had bred the ox. But there was fear that, if some people had an edge, others would be reluctant to enter the weight-guessing competition. With few entrants, you could not rely on the wisdom of crowds. The process of weight discovery would be damaged.

So strict regulatory rules were introduced. The farmer was asked to prepare three monthly bulletins on the development of his ox. These bulletins were posted on the door of the market for everyone to read. If the farmer gave his friends any other information about the beast, that information was also to be posted on the market door. And anyone who entered the competition who had knowledge about the ox that was not available to the world at large would be expelled from the market. In this way the integrity of the weight-guessing process would be maintained.

Professional analysts scrutinised the contents of these regulatory' announcements and advised their clients on their implications. They' wined and dined farmers; but once the farmers were required to be careful about the information they' disclosed, these lunches became less useful. Some smarter analysts realised that understanding the nutrition and health of the ox wasn't that useful anyway. Since the ox was no longer being weighed -- what mattered was the guesses of the bystanders -- the key' to success lav not in correctly assessing the weight of the ox but in correctly' assessing what others would guess. Or what other people would guess others would guess. And so on.

Some people -- such as old Farmer Buffett -- claimed that the results of this process were more and more divorced from the realities of ox rearing. But he was ignored. True, Farmer Buffett's beasts did appear healthy and well fed, and his finances ever more prosperous; but he was a countryman who didn't really understand how markets work.

International bodies were established to define the rules for assessing the weight of the ox. There were two competing standards -- generally accepted ox-weighing principles, and international ox-weighing standards. But both agreed on one fundamental principle, which followed from the need to eliminate the role of subjective assessment by any individual. The weight of the ox was officially defined as the average of everyone's guesses.

One difficulty was that sometimes there were few, or even no, guesses of the weight of the ox. But that problem was soon overcome. Mathematicians from the University of Chicago developed models from which it was possible to estimate what, if there had actually been many guesses as to the weight of the ox, the average of these guesses would have been. No knowledge of animal husbandry was required, only a powerful computer.

By' this time, there was a large industry of professional weight-guessers, organisers of weight-guessing competitions and advisers helping people to refine their guesses. Some people suggested that it might be cheaper to repair the scales, but they' were derided: why go back to relying on the judgement of a single auctioneer when you could benefit from the aggregated wisdom of so many clever people?

And then the ox died. Amid all this activity', no one had remembered to feed it.

[Jan 02, 2019] Jeff Bezos Tables Latest Breakthrough Cost-Cutting Idea After Realizing It's Just Slaves

Jan 02, 2019 |

SEATTLE -- Deciding at the last minute to hold off due to ethical concerns, Amazon founder and CEO Jeff Bezos reportedly set aside his latest cost-cutting initiative Wednesday after realizing it was actually human slavery. "On the surface, it seemed plausible -- owning our employees' bodies, implementing a mandatory 18-hour workday, restricting their movements, and not compensating them with anything besides minimal food and shelter -- but then it started to sound really familiar in a bad way," said Bezos, who acknowledged his fears were confirmed when Amazon's general counsel kept reporting back that such labor arrangements had been illegal throughout the United States since 1865. "It's too bad; the increased efficiency and cost savings would have been tremendous. And now I have to go explain to our shareholders why I spent $1.8 million outfitting all of our managers with bullwhips, shackles, and branding irons." Bezos went on to describe the setback as temporary, saying it wouldn't matter in five to 10 years when his entire workforce was robots.

[Jan 02, 2019] American People Admit Having Facebook Data Stolen Kind Of Worth It To Watch That Little Fucker Squirm

Jan 02, 2019 |

CHICAGO -- Saying it was ultimately a small price to pay in exchange for the splendid spectacle that has followed, millions of Americans admitted Thursday that they didn't really mind having their Facebook data stolen if it meant getting to watch that little fucker squirm.

[Dec 31, 2018] New is well forgotten old

The following cartoon from 2008 illustrated this point nicely

Trump promises vs reality: employment options

[Dec 27, 2018] 'Trickle down effect' and pub test

Dec 27, 2018 |

Phoroneus57 , 3 Jun 2018 23:03

'Trickle down effect' - the favourite buzzword of neoliberal supporters. I'd like to see trickle down effect tried at the local pub on the taps by the local mp. Imagine what would happen. Definitely doesn't pass the pub test.

[Dec 26, 2018] You might say that neoliberalism borrows from economics only in the sense that astrology borrows from astronomy.

Dec 26, 2018 |

phayes , 23 January 2014 at 03:51

That'd be like astronomers saying that although Hellenic astrology is pseudoscientific nonsense they can probably do business with Ptolemaic or Hindu astrology. Other scientists would laugh and call astronomy the dismal physics. Isn't it about time economists like yourself just told the knuckle dragging ideologues - of whatever colour and salinity - to fuck off?

Anonymous , 23 January 2014 at 04:12

Who is an economist who is not an ideologue?

[Dec 4, 2018] Something good in the USA future

rafael martorell , says: December 4, 2018 at 12:01 pm GMT

As Chalmers Johnson once said upon his wife question if he can see something good in the USA future: " yes ,the financial collapse"

Why did the stock market suffer its deepest plunge since October on Tuesday Here's an interesting theory

John, 7 hours ago
It's very simple and follows a familiar pattern:
  1. America has a problem, and,
  2. Trump claims to be able to solve the problem, and,
  3. Trump goes somewhere, and talks to somebody, and then later claims, contrary to what the other party is saying, that he has solved the problem, and, then
  4. The problem later turns out NOT to be solved.

[Dec 04, 2018] The best way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your wallet. ~Benjamin Franklin

[Nov 22, 2018] Here's one for all those who say, indignantly, "US debt is not 100% of GDP". No, that's right; it's not.

Nov 22, 2018 |

Mark Chapman November 14, 2018 at 8:46 pm

Here's one for all those who say, indignantly, "US debt is not 100% of GDP". No, that's right; it's not.

[Nov 17, 2018] Goldman Sachs CEO is "personally outraged" at criminal behavior in his bank

I guess he thinks Lloyd Blankfein god is a real greedy thief that would screw people for a dollar.
Nov 17, 2018 |
disreputable behavior in his bank.

... ... ...

Ah, yes. Goldman Sachs is famous for their "good work and integrity".

The US Department of Justice (DOJ) has said about $4.5 billion was misappropriated from 1MDB, including some money that Goldman Sachs helped raise, by high-level officials of the fund and their associates from 2009 through 2014.

US prosecutors filed criminal charges against 2 former Goldman Sachs bankers earlier this month. One of them, Tim Leissner, pleaded guilty to conspiracy to launder money and conspiracy to violate the Foreign Corrupt Practices Act.

I'm sure it was just a "few bad apples", like Goldman Sachs's Ex-CEO Lloyd Blankfein , who was personally involved in the transaction.
You might remember Lloyd from his doing "God's Work" .

[Oct 12, 2018] The Fundamentals are Strong!

Oct 10, 2018 |

"The fundamentals and future of the U.S. economy remain incredibly strong."

[Jun 28, 2018] Oil will never be above $44 WTI in my lifetime.

Jun 28, 2018 |

shallow sand x Ignored says: 06/27/2018 at 2:29 pm

"Oil will never be above $44 WTI in my lifetime."

Dennis Gartman.

[Jan 06, 2016] "The CEO of your company has probably already earned your 2016 salary this year" [WaPo].

Calling this tightening is like looking at a guy with a 28 inch waist walking around in 38 inch pants, and saying his pants have been tightened because they they were taken in to 37 inches.

Dan Kervick, , December 16, 2015 at 03:51 PM
Oh the humanity! It will now cost banks a quarter penny more to borrow an extra dollar of all those extra reserves that they don't need.

Calling this tightening is like looking at a guy with a 28 inch waist walking around in 38 inch pants, and saying his pants have been tightened because they they were taken in to 37 inches.

[Jan 01, 2016] Economics Joke Time

| naked capitalism
Posted on by

... ... ...

The Standup Economist has a routine that has become a classic:

And of course, there are the economist variants of the lightbulb joke, originating in a 1994 Wharton Journal, as later recapped in Forbes:

Q: How many economists does it take to change a light bulb?

A1: None. The darkness will cause the light bulb to change by itself.

A2: None. If it really needed changing, market forces would have caused it to happen.

A3: None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.

A4: None. There is no need to change the light bulb. All the conditions for illumination are in place.

A5: None. Because, look! It's getting brighter! It's definitely getting brighter!!!

A6: None. They're all waiting for the unseen hand of the market to correct the lighting disequilibrium.

tony, December 30, 2015 at 6:12 am

Q: What do you call an economist that makes a prediction?

A: Wrong.

ben, December 30, 2015 at 3:28 pm

Two economists are walking on the street. They notice a pile of horseshit, and the older one says to the younger one: "I'll pay you twenty thousand if you eat that." The younger one ponders for a moment, then agrees and eats it. They walk a bit more and run into another pile of horse feces. So the younger one tells the elder: "I'll pay you twenty thousand if you eat that!". The older economist considers the offer and starts eating. After a while the younger economists stops and asks: "What was the point of this? We both ate a pile shit and neither of us got richer." The older one answers: "What are you talking about? We both produced and received twenty thousand worth in income and services."

GDP. Great deposits of poo.

Clive, December 31, 2015 at 5:41 am

"This economy is really terrible."

"How bad is the economy?"

"The economy is so bad, this year oysters are making fake pearls…"

"The economy is so bad, organised crime just laid off 10 judges…"

(and so on)

Paul Jonker-Hoffrén, December 30, 2015 at 7:27 am

"Knock Knock!"

"Who's there?"

"It's Return to Growth!"

Two years later…

"Knock Knock!"

"Who's there?"

"It's Return to Growth!"

And ad finitum…

Clive, December 30, 2015 at 6:21 am

"Knock Knock"

"Who's there?"

"Janet Yellen"

"Well there's no need to shout, I heard you knocking"

Joaquin Closet, December 30, 2015 at 7:42 am

The number of economists is the only thing that contradicts the Law of Supply and Demand.

craazyboy, December 30, 2015 at 9:00 am

Q: How many economists does it take to change a light bulb?

A: Three. A micro-economist to hold the ladder, a macro-economist to rotate the room, and a university economist to develop the math model and forecast how long it will take.

Ulysses, December 30, 2015 at 9:56 am

A mathematician, an accountant and an economist apply for the same job at an oil company.

The interviewer calls in the mathematician and asks "What do two plus two equal?" The mathematician replies "Four." The interviewer asks "Four, exactly?" The mathematician looks at the interviewer hard and says "Yes, four, exactly."

Then the interviewer calls in the accountant and asks the same question "What do two plus two equal?" The accountant says "On average, four – give or take ten percent, but on average, four."

Then the interviewer calls in the economist and poses the same question "What do two plus two equal?" The economist gets up, locks the door, closes the shade, sits down next to the interviewer and says, "What do you want it to equal"?

Paul Tioxon, December 30, 2015 at 10:02 am

What do you call a cruise ship sinking with 500 PhD economists chained below deck?

A good start.

allan, December 30, 2015 at 10:03 am

Frederic Mishkin.

Yves Smith, December 30, 2015 at 4:32 pm

Oh, that is good!


An economist is someone who will tell you tomorrow why what they predicted yesterday didn't happen today.

An economist, a physicist, and an engineer are stranded on an island with a can of food, and no opener.

The engineer says, "Let's smash the can open with a rock and eat".
The physicist replies, "Naw, that's going to splatter the food all over the place. Let's light a fire, the expanding gases will force the can to pop open and presto: warm food!"
The economist says, "Bad idea: the can will explode and the food will be all over the place. Now… let's assume we have a can opener…."

Blue Meme

A physician, an engineer, and an economist were discussing who among them belonged to the oldest profession. The physician said, "Remember, on the sixth day God took a rib from Adam and fashioned Eve, making him the first surgeon. Therefore, medicine is the oldest profession."

The engineer replied, "But, before that, God created the heavens and earth from chaos, thus he was the first engineer. Therefore, engineering is an older profession than medicine."

Then, the economist spoke up. "Yes," he said, "But who do you think created the chaos?"


The First Law of Economists: For every economist, there exists an equal and opposite economist.
The Second Law of Economists: They're both wrong.

fresno dan

Pareto's law of optimal economic theory:
an economic theory has reached an optimal state when no other economist can make it wronger

pat b

The Third Law of Economists : The two economists theories don't add up.


"Economics is extremely useful as a form of employment for economists."
― John Kenneth Galbraith


JKG has some excellent one-liners. My favourite:

"The trouble with competition is that in the end somebody wins."

Joe Hill

"Again, since I'm not an economist I really have no idea what the wrong solution is."

~ @RudyHavenstein


[The financial crisis is worse than thought …]

James Hacker: Bernard, Humphrey should have seen this coming and warned me.

Bernard Woolley: I don't think Sir Humphrey understands economics, Prime Minister; he did read Classics, you know.

James Hacker: What about Sir Frank? He's head of the Treasury!

Bernard Woolley: Well I'm afraid he's at an even greater disadvantage in understanding economics: he's an economist.

– Yes Prime Minister, A Real Partnership


More economist jokes here:


Economists: purveyors of fictions upon which the superstructure of organized robbery is raised.
(apologies to Ambrose Bierce)


Q: What do you call an Economist who tells the truth?

A: Unemployed.


If you laid all the economists end to end,

it would probably be a good thing.

They still wouldn't reach a conclusion.


A farmer and two bankers are shipwrecked on an island. Two weeks later help finally arrives. The bankers greet their rescuer who remarks how well they look.

BankerA: "we realised the potential of the natural resources on this island were tremendous".

BankerB: "I created some fiat money, we divided it up. I lent BankerA ten times my share for a coconut farm startup, he invested ten times his share in an accountancy startup."

Rescuer: "well that's amazing, only where is it all, I don't see any produce – how did you actually survive?"

BankerA: "We each used our debt to invest in futures given the fertile land it was clear the land could generate wealth once labour was applied. We both realised significant paper profits. Oh and we ate the farmer"


Bankers live off our backs.


What did the supply curve say to the demand curve?

If you shift a little to the right, I'll give you some more of what you want.


Why did the economist cross the road?

Because his models predicted he would.


"Market Failure" is the name that economists who believe that the market cannot ever fail use when the market fails.


Hmm, it seems you should take your own advice to heart. :-)

What is a person called who claims to predict the future and has a history of 100% failure in predictions?

a) A Charlatan
b) An Economist
c) A prophet


In the same vein:
econ entropy: money invented from hot air evaporates, what do you expect?


"Economists put decimal points in their forecasts to show that they have a sense of humour"
- William Gilmore Simms (


How many economists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Only one, but the lightbulb has to be hanging from the ceiling. Because economists can only screw things up.

Minnie Mouse

It takes one economist to change a light bulb and take the entire power grid down.

James McFadden

"Did you ever think that making a speech on economics is a lot like pissing down your leg? It seems hot to you, but it never does to anyone else." Lyndon Johnson

[Dec 17, 2015] Thursday Humor Lawyer For Martin Shkreli Hike Fees 5,000%

Zero Hedge

A bit of humor, via The New Yorker:

A criminal lawyer representing Turing Pharmaceuticals chief Martin Shkreli has informed his client that he is raising his hourly legal fees by five thousand per cent, the lawyer has confirmed.

Minutes after Shkreli's arrest on charges of securities fraud, the attorney, Harland Dorrinson, announced that he was hiking his fees from twelve hundred dollars an hour to sixty thousand dollars.

Shkreli, who reportedly received the news about the price hike while he was being fingerprinted, cried foul and accused his attorney of "outrageous and inhumane price gouging."

"This is the behavior of a sociopath," Shkreli was heard screaming.

For his part, Shkreli's lawyer was unmoved by his client's complaint. "Compared to what he pays for an hour of Wu-Tang Clan, sixty thou is a bargain," he said.


this boy dont know it yet. he is in trouble. he gonna take the heat for a lot of americans being angry at scam street, corzine, obama. he is a diversion. if they kill him in rikers? wouldnt surprise me a bit.


This turn of events was fairly predictable Shrkeli is a safe scapegoat for US envy/hatred of just about everything. Surprised Martin did not see this coming and move to Shanghai well beforehand.


Gotta have a scapegoat when you quietly overturn cases on the BIG BOYS.

SAC insder trading

GE Capital municipal bong rigging


The 'GE Three' Go Free

"Then came a surprise last week, right before Thanksgiving. A federal judge ordered the men released from prison. An appeals court had reversed their convictions the day before, without explanation"

"Carollo, Goldberg and Grimm each had been convicted on multiple counts of conspiracy to commit wire fraud. Prosecutors accused them of paying kickbacks to brokers hired by cities and towns to oversee the bidding on municipal-investment contracts, which local governments use to invest the proceeds from bond sales. Goldberg was sentenced to four years in prison. Carollo and Grimm got three years each."

[Dec 15, 2015] New York - New York


"this town deserves a better class of criminal"

The Dark Knight - The Joker - Everything Burns - HQ (1:26)

[Dec 11, 2015] Demise of the US Middle Class Now Official

naked capitalism

Jim Haygood, December 10, 2015 at 1:11 pm

Hey, I was thinking the same thing, Johnny. This chart (from the Ambrose E-P article about China in today's links) shows that the US dollar took a mighty leap as the Asian crisis launched:

And it's doing it again since mid-2014, as J-Yel tightens while the rest of world plays competitive devaluation.


Maybe we can work as gardeners, trimming the hedges in front of the Federal Reserve Bank (and planting a little cannabis in the flowerbeds, now that it's legal in DC).

They're certainly not going to hire us to polish the gold bullion, as (1) they don't trust us, and (2) probably the gold paint would rub off of the tungsten core.

polecat, December 10, 2015 at 6:04 pm

that gives me an idea for new federal reserve crest/shield design…… three pot leaves in the upper diagonal w/ a gold trimmed tungsten bar in the lower side!

[Dec 09, 2015] Almost 70% Of US Stocks Are Below Their 200-Day Moving-Average Zero Hedge

Sudden Debt

Cramer did say yesterday that it's a buyers market and he doesn't understand why anybody would be a seller... :)

He just doomed the market!

[Oct 02, 2015] Economist's View 'Job Growth Weakens in September'

Dean Baker:
Job Growth Weakens in September:

Vile Content said...

plunge in oil prices is taking a large toll on the formerly booming mining sector. In addition, the high dollar
~~Dean Baker~

Oil costs less when dollar is strong? No lie! When $$$$ buy more of oil our trucking industry is booming? No S Dick Tracy! We now need 40,000 more of teamsters to drive our parked 18 wheeler-s? More truck driving slots than drivers? Because of strong $$$$? Increased labour demand through the magic of deflation! Look!

If you qualify for truck driver job, you can complete training without going into 6 figure debt, without having to pledge a fraternity, and without having to learn the words to your school's fight song. Plus, you get to see the entire 48 states without booking a flight, get to meet beautiful young waitresses at the truck stop that serves delicious slow food. Think of it! Now you get to relax in a modern truck where you can listen to country-and-Western's newest talent plus more much more.

All this and more from

the magic of deflation

[Oct 02, 2015] Fashionably Lean of Thought

Jesse's Café Américain

[Sep 25, 2015] That is brilliant - so Turing Pharmaceuticals is a classical - wait for it - parasitic infection!

reason, Friday, September 25, 2015 at 01:25 AM

"Item: Rights to a drug used to treat parasitic infections were acquired by Turing Pharmaceuticals, which specializes not in developing new drugs but in buying existing drugs and jacking up their prices. In this case, the price went from $13.50 a tablet to $750. ..."

That is brilliant - so Turing Pharmaceuticals is a classical - wait for it - parasitic infection!

[Sep 24, 2015] I love free markets

See also

[Sep 20, 2015] The American Dream By The Provocateur Network - YouTube

A simple animated explanation of HOW the private Federal Reserve steals your money and WHY it must be stopped

[Sep 16, 2015] Axel Merk Warns Investors Are In For A Rude Awakening Zero Hedge

Q: What's an investor? I know other terms such as manipulators, riggers, fixers, front runners, fraudsters, ponzi schemers, inside traders, spoofers, scammers, front men, bagmen, market makers, interventionists, plunge protectors, rehypothecators and Corzined... But who is Investor and what do they do?

A: Real investors invest in politicians.

[Sep 16, 2015] WTI Crude Soars Above $47 As Algos Finally Read DoE Report

Sep 16, 2015 | Zero Hedge

It appears the machines decided to read the whole DOE report after all... and run some more stops.

[Sep 07, 2015] Why The New Car Bubble's Days Are Numbered

' Yes I can! '
Sep 07, 2015 | Zero Hedge

Never One Roach

<< Consumers focused on the dollar amount of their monthly payment have taken advantage of low interest rates to sometimes buy more car than they might otherwise be able to afford. >>

Well, of course, I'm going to buy the Biggest chartreuse Escalade I can! I got to fill that 4.872 sf subprime house garage with something.

' Yes I can! '

[Sep 05, 2015] Fed Watch If You Ever Wondered Whose Side The Federal Reserve Is On...

Economist's View

Julio said...

Rasputin explained why the Fed must raise rates before the next recession, so it can lower them later:

"Certainly our Savior and Holy Fathers have denounced sin, since it is the work of the Evil One.
But how can you drive out evil except by sincere repentance?
And how can you sincerely repent if you have not sinned?"

[Aug 29, 2015] Why The Great Petrodollar Unwind Could Be $2.5 Trillion Larger Than Anyone Thinks

Aug 29, 2015 | Zero Hedge

cherry picker

It is humorous to note that the words "In God We Trust" are printed on the greenback.

Does that mean "In God We Trust" is only true if there is money?

If there is no money you can't trust "God" anymore?

A few decades ago all the evangelicals were always crying for donations to help with "God's Work" and Goldman Sach's states it is doing "God's" work too.

I think that may be a problem for many. They may feel God can't do anything without money, which strips the divine out of the "God" belief, doesn't it?

For many, God is the big financier in the sky :)

[Aug 26, 2015] What If The Crash Is As Rigged As Everything Else

Beam Me Up Scotty

I'm not so sure. This article might be spot on. Consider this:

Federal Reserve can print and create INFINITE digital and physical dollars. With infinite dollars, they can control EVERYTHING. Both UP and DOWN. We can't audit the Fed, how do you know their balance sheet is really 4 trillion? Because they say so? They could literally decide the prices of every single thing in dollar terms with unlimited dollars at their disposal.


Yo pods, next time you get a bag of M&Ms, eat the red ones first,,,


I don't think the Skxawng in charge have the organizational capability to pull off an event of this magnitude with any reasonable expectation of success. They manipulate where they can and surf the waves just like the rest of us...

Fahque Imuhnutjahb

...With the announcement of 'Merika's "ownership society", a huge housing bubble was blown, then popped. Who's to blame?, the ignorant borrowers

(akin to 4 year old climbing on the counter to get to the cookie jar), or the lenders to the lenders (akin to the parent standing back ,watching

the 4 year old scaling the precarious chair to get to the cookie jar 30 minutes before suppertime.)?

When the kid falls, busting the cookie jar, the parent rushes in eats the cookies, then raids the kids piggy bank to pay for the jar, then charges the

kid for the band-aids for the kids knees and elbows. DISASTER CAPITALISM


Russian roulette only they point the gun at your head, not theirs.

That, sir, is an awesome quote and should be used repeatedly.

[Aug 22, 2015] 330 Ramp Capital™ on Twitter @BarbarianCap not what I'm seeing

Carnage Worst Week For Stocks In 4 Years, VIX Soars Most Ever

Zero Hedge
J S Bach



"Hi, uh... Janet? Lloyd here again."

"Shalom, Lloyd."

"Yeah... whatevevah... shalom to you, too. Hey, we've had a pretty serious drop in the ma-"

"Yeah, yeah, I heard. So how much do you need this time?"

"I dunno, maybe a couple hundred billion?"

"Sigh. Okay... you'll have to wait til Monday though. I'll have to call Evelyn in the City to get approval on this one. Shouldn't be a problem."

"Thanks, gworgeous. We'll have to get together soon and toast QE with a little Manischewitz".


* click *


For the love of God - if there was ever a perfect song for today - Steely Dan nails it. Enjoy Black Friday boyz!

When Black Friday comes
I'll stand down by the door
And catch the grey men when they
Dive from the fourteenth floor

When Black Friday comes
I'll collect everything I'm owed
And before my friends find out
I'll be on the road

[Aug 13, 2015] US Shale Declining and OPEC Still Climbing - Peak Oil BarrelPeak Oil Barrel

"...Can't hurt one bit to pray for some relief from all of those mounting monetary losses. If anybody has money to bail out the oil conglomerates, God does. Maybe Goldman Sachs too, since they do God's work."
Ronald Walterm 08/11/2015 at 2:49 pm
Maybe the oil corps could get together on a Sunday morning in a church somewhere and have a prayer session to pray for higher oil prices. Realtors did when the housing crisis stuck them with a bag to hold.

Dear Lord, please help us by buying more oil. Surely, Lord, there must be a need for a couple of million barrels of oil each day in heaven that You can buy to ease our financial burdens. Lord, hear our prayer.

Can't hurt one bit to pray for some relief from all of those mounting monetary losses. If anybody has money to bail out the oil conglomerates, God does. Maybe Goldman Sachs too, since they do God's work.

God might tell the oil corps to go straight to hell, if so, then Goldman can answer all those prayers being they do God's work too. All it takes is money and the prayers are answered.


MarbleZeppelin, 08/11/2015 at 4:17 pm
That's right Ron, the oil companies' guardian angels will make a deal with the devil to produce a lot of abiogenic petroleum and suddenly the old fields will be oozing the stuff out again. Gushers galore on Monday morning. The banks will get the notice from the devil to fund more drilling and away we go, happy motoring for another fifty years.

Paul Craig Roberts The Eroding Character Of The American People Zero Hedge


OK, yesterday, 7/23/2015, I was sent to a Federal Pen, I spent five hours there doing mock job interviews. (This is the place that had Johnny Taliban for a while..

Me: "What was you're former occupation?"

Him: "I was a bank robber. There wasn't enough money in it, that's why I'm here."

Me: "What do you mean a bank robber? That 's been legalized since 2008! Call your fucking lawyer!!"

[Jul 24, 2015] Lloyd Blankfein becomes a billionaire [Bloomberg]. See what happens when you've got a President who will stand between you and the pitchforks?

Lloyd Blankfein becomes a billionaire [Bloomberg]. See what happens when you've got a President who will stand between you and the pitchforks?
Jul 24, 2015 | naked capitalism

Lloyd Blankfein becomes a billionaire [Bloomberg]. See what happens when you've got a President who will stand between you and the pitchforks?

[Jul 24, 2015] Nomura on Q2 GDP and Annual Revision

"... So anyway, what's the evidence that professional economists who publish research notes for large firms really understand the actual economy? Have these guys at Nomura ever gotten the big picture right when it really matters? If they had, why would they be telling us?..."
Rob Dawg wrote on Fri, 7/24/2015 - 12:32 pm
...some factors such as low energy prices and the strong dollar likely continued to weigh on business activity.

Raise hands. How many here think low energy prices weighed on business activity?

Wisdom Seeker wrote on Fri, 7/24/2015 - 12:43 pm

So anyway, what's the evidence that professional economists who publish research notes for large firms really understand the actual economy? Have these guys at Nomura ever gotten the big picture right when it really matters? If they had, why would they be telling us?

poicv2.0 wrote on Fri, 7/24/2015 - 12:43 pm

It seems pretty logical that all that savings from lower oil price is going to result in consumers buying more IPhones, Yukon Denalis with 25" spinner rims and new housing.

[Jul 23, 2015] Onion Explains The Rise Of China

Jul 23, 2015 | The Onion

How do you build the world's second-largest economy? The Onion explains China's growth.

[Jul 22, 2015] Short tutorial on Neoliberalism

Man Pushed Off Plate Of Chicken Wings By Larger Male

[Jul 10, 2015] Sweet smell of napalm fracking

allan July 9, 2015 at 2:30 pm

From the Department of What Could Possibly Go Wrong:
Group Tries to Bypass NYS Fracking Ban By Using Gel Propane
At least farmers won't then be irrigating using fracking wastewater!

Peter Pan July 9, 2015 at 3:26 pm

So would this be considered a sort of napalm fracking?

sufferinsuccotash July 9, 2015 at 3:40 pm

The smell of victory!

[Jul 10, 2015] Trump'd

"...This is bordering on hero worship with this guy and, frankly, I think that's dangerous. That's exactly how the Ds ended up shoving Obama down everyone's throat and look how lousy that turned out."
Jul 9, 2015 | Zero Hedge

Republican preferences of Presidential candidates ;-)

1st choice 2nd choice
Donald Trump



Jeb Bush 11% 7%
Rand Paul 11% 7%


Trump filed for bankruptcy protection in 1991, 1992, 2004 and 2009. I have zero interest in putting him in charge of anything remotely connected to my prosperity or posterity.

But I will say this, with Hillary! the current frontrunner, fully 98% of democrats are insane ;-)

Paveway IV

Witht that kind of experience, we should make him president of Puerto Rico.

Not My Real Name

Trump is too much of an ego maniac to have that kind of power.

You mean like Obama?


Wrong. The popularity of Trump and Sanders is they are actually talking reality versus the papsmear crapola that comes out of the mouths of the corporate polititcians from both sides. They also actually have policies that appeal to the majority of the people in their respective parties. Most people oppose the crony trade deals that get signed that do nothing for the people yet enrich the CEO and the politician that passes the bill after they are out and get massive "speaking" fees. Not the corporatists such as Bush and Hillary - never met a trade deal favorable to corporations they didnt like. Quid, meet Pro and Quo.

Southpark said it best regarding voting and elections: But Stan, don't you know, it's always between a giant douche and a turd sandwich. Nearly every election since the beginning of time has been between some douche and some turd. They're the only people who suck up enough to make it that far in politics."


Thanks for the heads up. Is there any candidate that is not in AIPAC's pocket?

[Jun 09, 2015] People and Power – The Technology Threat

Jun 09, 2015 | naked capitalism

Ep3, June 8, 2015 at 6:15 am

Yves, my first level accounting professor told me to minor in computers, and he was tremendously correct. All accounting today relies on database management, either SQL or some close cousin.

Sure, u still have to be able to put together a balance sheet and P&L. But the more u can automate that, the less the traditional accounting function is needed.

sam s smith, June 8, 2015 at 1:08 pm

Automation has been very useful to accounting fraud.

[May 15, 2015] Fed-Up Employee Just About 14 Years Away From Walking Out Door

The Burning Platform

WALTHAM, MA-Frustrated with a growing list of unacceptable workplace indignities, fed-up Catamount Systems employee Marc Holden is just about 14 years away from walking out the front door of his office and never returning, sources confirmed Thursday. "I swear to God, if things don't improve around here real fast, I am out of here in 14 years or so-I am not bluffing," Holden said, noting that if he has to endure just a decade and a half more of company-wide incompetence and pointless micromanagement, he is gone for good. "Seriously, I don't think I can take any more than 3,000 more days of this before I snap. Mark my words, if 2029 rolls around and it's still the same old shit around here, I'm cleaning out my desk, getting on that elevator, and never coming back."

Holden added that if his boss belittled him in front of the entire staff just 200 more times, he would storm right into his office and tell him exactly where he can stick it.

[Apr 14, 2015] Levitation of the US financial market

Hat tip to Jesse

[Mar 28, 2015] The confidence fairy seems to have turned into a confidence witch

Economist's View

Gloomy European Economist, Francesco Saraceno:

The Confidence Witch: ...The confidence fairy seems to have turned into a confidence witch. One more victim of the crisis. But this one will not be missed

... ... ...

pgl said...

Maybe this should be called the Confidence Bitch.

kthomas said in reply to pgl...

The Confidence the Clown.

[Mar 19, 2015] Dollar Flash Crashes Currency Market Pulverized As Dollar Implodes After Close

Zero Hedge


This is just short term noise. Long term Dollar investors aren't going to be swayed by this, and neither should you. A strong dollar is a fundamental part of our Federal Reserve's dual mandate, and we're lucky to have a Federal Reserve chariwoman that understands this. We also need to dispel this myth that lower interest rates mean a weaker dollar - this empirically isn't the case.

The reason our economy continues to grow is precisely because of low interest rates fueling aggregate demand, which in turn strengthens the dollar. These are some basic elementary economic facts that Zerohedgers just cant seem to understand.


Doomers on this site should consider the enourmous cost of their pessimism and far-right ideologies. There are some incredible health benefits to believing in government, which many of you would be wise to consider. People who believe in government have more peace of mind, produce less cortisol (the stress hormone), worry less, and are far more likely to enjoy their lesuire time. All of these benefits reduce the risk of stress related diseases. Just look up the statistics - if you look at the disparity between government employees and private sector employees the effects are even more extreme.

[Feb 1, 2015] CBS Follies Every Breath You Take Lyrics

See also YouTube - Every Breath Bernanke Takes. It's really high qaulity parody... The lead performer's name is Michael O'Rorke. MBA 2006... Poor Helicopter Ben :-). 4:15pm
Feb 1, 2008 | The Big Picture

reported that the WSJ's Marketbeat was just as amused:

Glenn Hubbard: King of Pain

Today's best four minutes of the day: an uproarious parody of the Police's "Every Breath You Take" by students at Columbia Business School, which purports to show the school's dean, Glenn Hubbard -- and, no, that is not Mr. Hubbard, the school confirms, but a look-alike student -- taking Fed Chairman Ben Bernanke to task for monetary policy mistakes (in a fit of jealousy over not getting the position). It's hard to resist the charm of any attempt to poke at the Fed, especially one that includes the couplet "Hope your models break/bet that beard is fake." The real Mr. Hubbard was traveling and could not be reached for comment.

April 26, 2006 [George W. Bush:] "Ben Bernanke is the right man to build on the record that Alan Greenspan has established. I will urge the Senate the act promptly to confirm Ben Bernanke as the fourteenth Chairman of the Federal Reserve."

Every breath you take
Every change of rate
Jobs you don't create
While we still stagflate
I'll be watching you\

Every single day
Bernanke takes my pay
When growth goes away
Inflation will stay
I'll be watching you

Oh can't you see?
The Fed's where I should be
How my poor heart aches
With each of your mistakes

First you move your lips
Hike a few more BPS
When demand then dips
And the yield curve flips
I'll be watching you

Since you came supply's lost without a trace
I dream at night that I punch you in the face
Your interest policies I cannot embrace
I feel so wronged and I long for Greenspan's place
I keep cryin': Benny! Benny! Please...

Oh can't you see?
The Fed Chair should be me
How my poor heart aches
When prices escalate

Every move you make
Every oath you take
Hope your models break
Bet that beard is fake
I'll be watching you

CBS is great
Wouldn't change my fate
But we'll be watching you
We'll be watching you

[Jan 30, 2015] Crude Oil Prices Are Spiking (Again)

Zero Hedge


top cnbc headline: Why crude won't rebound any time soon

Frank N. Beans

If lower oil prices were great for consumers, then higher oil prices indicate that the economy is expanding, which is also great for consumers. Win Win!

(this is sarcasm)

[Jan 29, 2015] The Pros & Cons Of Fracking

Zero Hedge
Gas prices are plummeting across America thanks in part to the country doubling its daily oil exports, which is made possible by chemical fracturing technology that scientists have said wreaks havoc on the environment. Here are some pros and cons of fracking:




I like the fact that you can use the word in so many ways. Some examples...

Frack you!

Frack me!

I don't know what that fracking means.


How the frack are you?

What the frack?

I'm gonna fracking beat the crap out of you!

I fracked that bitch last night.

I'm so fracked!

Frack off!

You're a fracking genius!

She's so fracking hot!

I wouldn't frack her with your dick and him pushing.


Fracking A!

Wanna frack?


Let's keep going.

Go frack yourself!

You wanna frack with me?

Get the frack outta here!

I fracked your wife last night, motherfracker, what are you gonna do about it?

[Jan 26, 2015] Job Description – Rogue Trader

Blast from the past
Jan 26, 2008 |

The following is an extract from "Traders, Guns & Money: Knowns & Unknowns in the Dazzling World of Derivatives"J (2006; Pearson Education) © 2006 Satyajit Das

Position Title

(Rogue) Trader. (The "rogue" term is generally not to be used explicitly especially with senior management, directors, shareholders and clients for fear of misunderstanding.)

Reporting Line

The position reports along "functional' and "geographic" lines to the Head of Trading and Head of the Region. (Nobody, really. A multi-dimensional matrix structure is currently in operation so that everybody reports to several people allowing a total absence of accountability.)


Optional. (Some candidates may have a preference for working in head office where total confusion and chaos reigns facilitating successful rogue trading. Other candidates may prefer a remote location where benign neglect and absence of supervision may provide rogue trading opportunities.)

Organisational Environment

A leading edge investment bank with a global brand, presence in key financial markets, superb product range and unparalleled client list.

(Our PR firm told us this.)

A global trading team trading in a wide variety of cash and synthetic instruments, including a number of "proprietary" structures.

(You can lose money pretty much any way you like. There are some trades that even we don't understand but the models say we are making money).

Supported by a world class risk management team (they are readily identifiable by their guide dogs) and operational staff and systems (they have been specially chosen for their total ignorance.)

Excellent career prospects (We have sinecures for everybody who has failed to perform.)

Key Responsibilities

Trading with the bank's capital to achieve targeted risk adjusted returns on capital under the bank's unique Economic Capital Allocation system. (If you are half as smart as you think you are then you will be able to game the system from day 1. Everybody else has.)

Developing innovative trading strategies. (You need to be able to come up with hare brained trading schemes based on the relationship between the El Nino cycle and market prices.)

Closely managing trading positions. (You need to be able increase your bet when your position shows losses until you bankrupt the firm.)

Major Challenges

Develop proper models and valuation procedures (You need to ensure that all pricing models are impossible to understand and give the valuations that you want by simple unverifiable changes in model inputs.)

Risk management of positions (You will need to fudge all the Greek risk measures. We suggest you start to report risk data in an ancient Nubian dialect that is purely oral. You will ensure that your risk always appears miniscule irrespective of market conditions. People have a tendency to panic otherwise.)

Monitoring (You will need to be able to disguise breaches by not booking the trades or taking advantage of systems deficiencies.)

Control losses and volatility of earnings (You must disguise losses either by recording them as amounts owed to you (the Leeson gambit), undertaking off-market trades such as deep in-the-money options (the Rusnak variation) or incorrect valuations (Rogue Trading 101).)

You need to be able to take the trading function to a new plane. (You need to show larger losses than the last rogue trader the firm employed.)

Selection Criteria

Detailed knowledge of financial markets and trading techniques.

(You should wax lyrically about obscure markets (the Zambian Kwatcho and Islamic finance techniques) and complex mathematics (field theory; neural networks; fractals; Frank copula models). Everybody will think you are a genius or a fool but will be unsure of which.)

Detailed knowledge of derivatives, including exotic and non-standard structures. (Everybody knows that derivatives allow highly leveraged positions that are impossible to understand or value accurately.)
No minimum formal educational qualifications or direct previous experience in a similar role is necessary. (Nobody believes your CV. It is merely a statement of your aspirations. Nobody will believe you if you said that you had rogue trading experience.)<

Ability to communicate and work closely with senior management (You will need to make sure that you generate enough "phantom" profits to make sure their bonus expectations are met.)

Ability to work closely with operational staff (You must bully them or cajole them into concealing limit breaches and losses.)

Strong leadership qualities (You will claim all profits are the result of your perspicacious skills. All losses will either disappear or if found will be hedge losses offset against gains in other positions.)

Desirable Criteria

Preferred age – under 30 years. (Have you ever heard of an old rogue trader? There is an exception for Japanese rogue traders who are generally older.)

Strong personal qualities. (You will have "attitude". A year round sun tan and a wisp of beard underneath your chin is good. You will treat everybody around you as idiots incapable of understanding the complex nature of your trading strategies.)

Highly motivated. (You will need to be able to hide losses and limit breaches. The Japanese rogue traders never took holidays.)


Negotiable including a strong performance linked component. (You don't need to be paid as it is assumed that you will defalcate ample amounts.)

Social Responsibility Statement

We are proud to be an equal opportunity employer. (We do not discriminate on any basis. How else can you explain the calibre of Directors and Senior Management not to mention risk managers and auditors that we have?)

Note: The idea is based on a column published by Trevor Sykes (writing as Pierpoint) of the Australian Financial Review [see "Indispensable Guide For Rogue Traders" (30 January 2004) Australian Financial Review] However, the text is different.

[Jan 24, 2015] A Bunch Of Criminals

Zero Hedge

...completely nonsensical largesse the ECB permits itself to launch, aimed at once again saving a banking system, but which will not only not help the European people, it will make things even much worse than they already are.

... ... ...

Forget the Central Banks, as I have mentioned here many times, the ECB lowered the Reserve Ratio for member to banks to 1% (ONE PERCENT)!


calling them criminals is an injustice to criminals


more like a swarm of locust

Feel it Reel it

The Lawyers protect the Bankers. The bankers pay the Lawyers(political contibutitions)...If you realize roughly 50-55% of the U.S. House and Senate are lawyers/trail lawyers then it all makes sense of why we are where we are....and don't forget Obama is/was a Lawyer as is Biden.... The Lawyers and Bankers protect each other and are at the top of the Pyramid scheme... The profession that never gets regulated or talked about is the Law profession....The majority of Lawyers in Politics are corrupt it's that simple....We live in a litigious society where you are encouraged to sue regardless of how friviolus it might be... Political correctness is driven by the Lawyers who are the Politicians....


The Lawyers protect the Bankers. The bankers pay the Lawyers(political contibutitions)...

You missed the ROOT of the problem...

And the sheep keep obeying, no matter what.


Correct, most sheep don't even pay attention to politics or world events. They just want to come home after working 8 hrs while only 3 of those hours was for themselves, and turn on some phoney distraction "Tee Vee" These people have no idea how badly they are being represented by there favourite politician that did get elected.

If you are invited to play poker with a bunch of cheaters and you accept, sit down and aloow your money to be cheated out of you.

Do you deserve it?

[Dec 13, 2014] Citigroup to Move Headquarters to US Capitol Building via @newyorker

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)-The banking giant Citigroup announced on Friday that it would move its headquarters from New York to the U.S. Capitol Building, in Washington, D.C., in early 2015.

Tracy Klugian, a spokesperson for Citi, said that the company had leased thirty thousand square feet of prime real estate on the floor of the House of Representatives and would be interviewing "world-class architects" to redesign the space to suit its needs.

According to sources, Citi successfully outbid other firms, including JPMorgan Chase and Goldman Sachs, for the right to move its headquarters to the House floor. ...

[Jan 26, 2014] From elephant to a mouse

Jan 25, 2014 |

[Jan 03, 2014] Mixed Thinking about Markets

Economist's View

The Keystone Garter said...

...the avg Americans gives away 42% of found money. But first year economics students only give away 20%. The economics curriculum in the USA needs to change.

[Jan 02, 2014] The Corporate "Free Speech" Racket by Haley Sweetland Edwards

The Washington Monthly

[Dec 30, 2013] Possibility of the end of Great Stock Market Rally of 2013

[Dec 30, 2013] Jane Austen Explains Monetary Policy

"I wonder how Harry Potter would put it..."
Dec 30, 2013 | Zero Hedge

Who knew? Jane Austen was a dyed-in-the-wool, easy-money-loving, stimulus-demanding 'expert' on monetary policy. As Citi's Steven Englander finds in his eloquent new year's note, it seems the antiquated authoress has much sense-and-sensibility to reproach those of us who believe in real money and a return to a real economy. From justifying QE, "Money is the best recipe for happiness," to the importance of the wealth effect, "If this man had not twelve thousand a year, he would be a very stupid fellow;" Austen offers some 'balance' to offer on Fed transparency, tapering, and congressional spending.

Via Citi's Steve Englander,

'Elinor now found the difference between the expectation of an unpleasant event, however certain the mind may be told to consider it, and certainty itself." – particularly apt in light of the market reaction to tapering.




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